Anal Intercourse Reconsidered

I have kicked about this planet for over half a century - I am approaching my 52nd year - and I cannot honestly say that I see any much point in anal intercourse*.

Other insights to follow when, and - or if - I have any.



*[edit] I should have added - "any more". I was in my green days an aficionado.

Goodwill to All Men

This year I am not in a " festive" mood.

Quite the opposite in fact.

War

This is totally warry.

Strange

Snob.

I















...but that's enough about me.

Selling a russian-language artsy-voguesy hypheny-hypheny phoo phoo magazine in a box for £4.50 out of W H Smiths at Charing Cross Station is blackholeuarly way more fuck off than poor Jeremy Clarkson's pitiful doing puddles on your carpet. Using Cyrillic script as a marketing tool is... BUY THINGS YOU DON'T UNNERSTAN'

Which is hem hem th'zeitgeist innit no.

Yes I bought one but I know how to deal with substances. Also emanations - free tip here, if you are approached by an ectoplasm just hit it with your walking stick and watch it unfurl or snap back into the groin of the emanator. I have much wisdom but I can't afford to give everything away for free I am a poor man too, and if you won't pay for advice you won't act on it.

Whatever

Heat in the flat -
Stink of white spirit
We will hide at the station
Where nobody asks.

Pornography

It may not work.

November

I would have put a £10 on my card for the gas so I can warm myself. Also you need £10 on another card for the electricity to set fire to the gas.

They get you both ways.

Readers: Pity you drank it before you even got to the shop.

Self: Now I am cold.
wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

sorry, just scraping some poo off my "w" key.

Readers: How sure are you that sea-going pterodactyls were coloured the same way as gulls?

Self: One of them fuckers ate my gas card.