Friday, 27 February 2015

The Very Thin Red Line

The Prime Minister today announced a "tactical withdrawal" in defence spending, claiming that "this most difficult of military manoeuvres" had been carried out with "consummate skill".

"We will spending less little on Defence as a percentage of GDP than any other nation of Europe except those who are spending more. Let no-one call the British 'pussy'. Mark my words and mark them well: any aggressor, Mr Putin, can look forward to a nasty poke up the nostril like... this."

Later he unveiled the latest addition to the nation's battlefield might.

BAA Systems Integrated Systems System (United Kingdom, 2015)
Note the forward-mounted eye prod and the Breville custard pie silo over the engine hatch. Planned upgrades include the addition of an Automatic Pie Hurler which will leave the crew's hands free to operate the Squirty Flower point defence solution.

Wednesday, 18 February 2015

The Mince Pie Salesman in February

COMING SOON!!! to a blog near you

Readers: Soooooooooooon!Sooooooooooooooooooooooon!

Blogista: Yes, that'll be something to look forward to.

Readers: Oh yes, we do look forward to having something to look forward to!!!

Sunday, 15 February 2015


Gladly the cross-eyed bear...

...and I've been laughing like a drain ever since I heard it. About forty years ago that was. Bloody good value, those mondegreens.


Now back to the day job.


Vickers-Armitage Battlefield Crapper Mk I (Great Britain, 1936)
Note the forward-mounted straining handle and the Izal drum over the engine hatch. Both proved vulnerable in battle conditions and for the Mk II (1941) were fitted inside the crew compartment.

Palivec P-45 Divisional Toasted Sandwich Maker (Czechoslovakia, 1963)
A powerful turbofan power plant gave the P-45 a distinct edge over any NATO equipment then in service. However, advances in Soviet nuclear technology saw this vehicle redeploying to reserve units as early as 1965.