Thursday, 11 October 2007


Phrase of the Day (ta-daaa)

ето ёжу ясно

eto yozhu yasno

It is obvious, "it is clear to a hedgehog".


Sleep (hours per day) so far this week...

Sunday : 0
Monday: 1
Tuesday: 0.5
Wednesday: 2

I'm surprised I can still function at all. I should be wandering round the office looking like the Return of the Mummy, only with a rictus grin and an apple-green silk tie.

Oh well. I have raised an Issue, resolved several Issues, produced a Schedule and Escalated twice (resulting a We Hear You meeting for Admin, and a Mild Bollocking for an uppity Team Leader), not bad for week one.

On the other hand I have not written any Reports for the Progress Meeting tomorrow. I have nothing to report. And, a Project Manager, I have made no Gantt Charts. I am relying on boyish charm and obfuscation to carry me through, but it won't work next week.


Tuesday 02:15, on the doorstep of the B&B for some fresh air and a cigarette.

With me is a woman in her mid-fifties, who was married for sixteen years before her husband died. She had two sons by him. She married again, had a daughter, Dana, and divorced after a year.

Her elder son committed suicide age 21 when his girlfriend left him.

Her parents left her their house, which she sold for £110,000.

Dana used to be a silver service waitress, but now age 29 she is on sickness benefit and has left her boyfriend of six years and her daughter for a girlfriend, Marie.

Dana and Marie have the double room, Mum has the single, £220 for the night.

Marie wants some of her £110,000 to start a business buying cars from scrap yards and rebuilding them. Some times she is a good girl, but she can be very nasty.

They were staying in a B&B in Hastings, but Dana and Marie trashed their room and the police told them to leave Sussex or be arrested.

So they have come to Croydon, are going to Wandsworth tomorrow, and Mum is tired of seeing her money drain away and wants to be rid of Dana and Marie, but can't because her daughter depends on her.

I felt very sorry for her. All she wanted was to live alone in a little house in the country with a Yorkshire terrier. But I had the feeling that she was going to lose.


Wickedred said...

1.) That is a very cute hedgehog

2.) Raising Issues - you must be very important.

3.) Charts. Ugh.

4.) I would like Tennesse Williams to come back from beyond the grave to tell the tale of the family of whom you speak.

5.) Sleep will come. I promise. Breathe.

YesBut said...

You really know how to write a blog to cheer a reader up - well after reading your blog, I realize my life isn't all that bad.

There are some interesting stories to be heard in B&Bs, surprised someone hasn't taken it up as a TV soap - no I don't mean "Crossroads"!!!

New job, away from home all very stressful. Hope you'll be able to relax at the weekend.

Keeping my fingers crossed for a better second week.

Keep smiling.

x said...

Maybe fewer fags and more exercise Mr C?

I always really liked the first few weeks of a new contract, imagining all the exciting things that were going to happen in a new place, being ravaged by nymphos etc. Usually the absolute high spot ended up being a Mozart recital at the local library with a housemate.

x said...

£220 for one double room and one single room? In a B&B?

Mad Dog said...

Nice roomates. Look, Chertz you'll be slitting your wrists by the end of the month if you keep this up. And I must agree with some of the other comments. The ciggies will kill you (you know this) -it's time to get a nicotine patch and a gym membership. Surely there must be some tai chi classes or something close by. Croydon can seriously damge your health!

x said...

Was my stomping ground in sixth form and couple years after uni. Wonder if the Montaz Pac is still there? Best Indian ever, on main street on left, approaching West Croydon station from Thornton Heath.

Some Chinese place we used to go, to forget name. Some chap tried to steal a fork and was attacked with baseball bats by about thirty Chinese all called Wong. Being a have a go hero I hid in the bog.

Chertiozhnik said...

It is a suspiciously clean hedgehog. Been scrubbed, somewhere, by somebody.

I am very important - this last week anyways. Sweepstake : how long before I am discovered.

I am not as badly off as the very drunken bloke I found on the doorstep of the B&B. He owned in this world... his room keys, 1 kebab in a yallery-orange polystyrene box with a white plastic spork stuck in the top, 1 roll-up cigarette. Down on his luck. I lit his roll-up fag for him while he balanced his kebab box on the balustrade. Both operations successful.

I felt good about contributing to the Gross National Product, however marginally.

Pig in clover, me.

threaded said...

You need to watch this video. It'll maybe help you sleep.

OHara said...

I think I might cry. Gawd, life sucks.