Saturday, 28 July 2007

Fireside Chat

Hey, pop-pickers, let's see what's really happening in th'Charts!

At #1 for the second week running, doggers want to be free to have sexual intercourse in a car park and take photographs of themselves having sexual intercourse in a car park for the second week running.

Nobody was ever out to stop you guys! But 68,721 votes to agree we weren't ever going to anyway!!! Wow?! That's Democracy! In action!!!

Straight in from nowhere, #8 for a family support centre in Grays Lane. Grays Lane... where? I don't know, nor do they!?! Another 23,918 voters don't have a clue either, but they still like it!!!

Up the Charts with a bullet! Out of nothing up to #9!!!!!!!!!!!! Ride horses two abreast, and think of a horse as a bicycle in a cycle lane? Last week, 0, this week 18,073 people are rooting for our two-wheeled friends! Look out, all you pedestrian bipeds! Opeeeen Seeeeason!!!!!!!!

At #11, weeks in the chart and not creepin' near th'Top Ten at all, a referendum about something. With 15,933 votes.

And at #13, Jeremy Clarkson for Prime Minister. 13,943 votes and a bullet.

A personal plea from your Disc Jockey:

I felt really bad about having to blapse my wife last time round, even though I was fucking Lida Baarova a bit. Okay, not only Lida. But, y'know, don't put me in that bad place this time. Feel my hurt. Maybe in my next post I will explain how I learned to deal with it all, how I had to be sensitive and brave at the same time.









And I had to total my kids as well.

5 comments:

x said...

Govt. ever had deny any plans to curb public photography and pretend nobody ever suggested it. Strange, rings a bell, and my capacity for vague recollections is quite astonishing.

x said...

That got garbled too. Sorry brain garbled this morning.

OHara said...

I thought they already had restrictions in public places - ever been to a swimming baths?

x said...

What? You mean I'm not allowed to take snaps under the cubicle walls anymore?

Chertiozhnik said...

Mr. X, funny how They keep replying to the petitions, "oh nooo, we really really weren't thinking of doing that."

I haven't been to a swimming baths for decades, O'Hara, do they ban all photography now? Hmmm... hardly worth my while going, then. The Not-A-Proposal which HMG haven't made seems to concern carrying ID Cards when doing any public snapping. Sillier and sillier.